I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You can't special order awesome
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
