My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
