that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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