apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
where am i from again
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
