I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
