Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
