We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize
