Do vagina's smell?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
