Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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