I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I want you more than these girls want KFC
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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