Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize