so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
