How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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