so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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