i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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