just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
