someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize