My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Randomize
