Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
