you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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