i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
