a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
