Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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