you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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