the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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