she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
