Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize