So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
