farters have to be the big spoon...
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Randomize