She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
