capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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