Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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