The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
