ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
