Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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