Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
