its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
