I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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