Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
