they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
