i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize