cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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