dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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