In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
