I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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