Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
