What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
My orgasm happened in two different decades
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
