Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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