? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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