We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
