R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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